It was in February 2013 that I met Noel Biderman, the King of Infidelity, a few days before the launch of his adultery website, Ashley Madison (AM), in Greece.
“I did not invent adultery, I just perfected it,” he told me with a smile brimming across his face.
“Men are not engineered for monogamy and it’s actually a minority of us that will be successful with it.”
Biderman dubbed himself as a mere facilitator for marital infidelity, stressing that AM is just a platform. He vowed to being faithful to his wife and mother of two, but as a businessman he was eager to fill “the whole in the online market”.
“No website is going to convince anyone to cheat unless you’re already looking for a way out of an unhappy situation,” he said during our interview for Queen.gr
He then went on to reassure our readers that all data is kept secret as his website provided full anonymity to its members, who supposedly could at any time delete all traces of their activity on AM with a small fee.
A group of hackers calling itself Impact Team proved him wrong by following through its threats to expose the fraudulent persona and safety standards behind the infamous adultery site.
The Impact Team published a huge cache of personal data onto the dark web, which appeared to include customer information that was stolen a month ago from the cheating spouses site.
Millions of email addresses for customers of AM worldwide, whose tagline is ‘Life is short. Have an affair’, were exposed.
AM is a member of the Toronto-based parent company Avid Life Media (ALM), along with CougarLife.com and EstablishedMen.com
“We have explained the fraud, deceit, and stupidity of ALM and their members. Now everyone gets to see their data,” the hackers told Wired.
The second dump of data stolen directly from the mother company reveals the CEO had multiple affairs, despite claims he stayed faithful to his wife even after the data leak.
In a message accompanying the emails, the hackers said: “Hey Noel, you can admit it’s real now.”
Government officials, civil servants and executives at European and North American corporations were the infamous website’s prominent members worldwide. Amongst them many Australians and prominent members of Victoria’s Greek community.
Western Australia scores the top rate per account of AM users registering with a credit card, while Victoria ‘proudly’ takes second place. Queensland follows closely with NSW/ACT, SA, Tasmania and the Northern Territory gearing up.
More than 700 Australian government email addresses (.gov.au) have been leaked, with subscriptions dating back to 2008, including emails of police, military, state justice and education departments, councils, emergency services and the National Australia Bank.
Since the hack, ALM has indefinitely postponed the adultery site’s IPO plans and has issued a directive to its members urging them to pay a fee in order to delete their accounts. The hacker team proved AM wrong once again by unearthing recently deleted accounts last week.
David Kennedy, founder and security consultant at TrustedSec, confirmed that the fresh release of data is authentic.
According to Melbourne solicitor Dean Kalymniou, the list of detrimental repercussions on the exposed users is endless.
“Apart from relationship breakdown, possible employment discrimination, financial institution discrimination when applying for loans, it could also result in cases of physical violence.
“A married man, father of two, called me just yesterday terrified of what would happen if his family and employees find out he was on the website,” Kalymniou added.
Neos Kosmos contacted psychologist Vicky Manikas, who said that when this information is shared it can lead to ongoing difficulties as the person who committed the adultery will never be looked at the same way again by friends or family members.
“It would be entirely dependent on each person’s situation, as some couples are able to contain this type of information and not share it with other family members and friends,” she explained, especially if the couple hopes to stay together and work through the problem.
“Also, the partner who was cheated on may feel that their family and friends disapprove of their decision to stay with their partner or break up with their partner.”
Meanwhile, Manikas notes that couples which try to work through adultery face ongoing trust issues to the detriment of their relationship.
“The partner who cheated often feels they have no privacy and are constantly being questioned by their partner,” she says.
Despite the negative publicity surrounding the attack, demand for AM’s services has been steady since the data breach was first announced in July, as proved by internet dating consultancy Courtland Brooks.
“I’m not sure what this proves,” Manikas said, stressing that it is indicative of a large number of people who find the idea of new and different encounters appealing.
“I don’t think there would be this many people actually cheating in reality and that the numbers are enhanced by the online experience. The internet provides a level of safety and anonymity that allows the fantasy of this type of encounter to be enhanced.”
Manikas agrees, though stresses that “honesty is the best answer here”.
“It will provide a more solid foundation for moving forward and keeping the relationship going and will also allow for those who are not in happy relationship the chance to move on and find what they are looking for.”
Avid Life Media has been contacted for further comments.