My mum (Filio Kottakis) was 92.
She was from the island of Samos, where she worked and helped as the firstborn to a family of seven, one of whom passed early. She wasn’t permitted to go to school as there was so much for her to do around the house as her brothers and sisters were being born and the crops and animals needed tending to. Being a firstborn girl wasn’t the preferred option for a village, I wonder if she knew of this from early on and if it had any effect on her because she worked very hard and tried the best she could for her parents and others in her extended family. It amazes me to think that as a little girl, she could look after her siblings and later, work growing the food they would eat.
Mum came to Melbourne as a passenger aboard The Begona in 1957, to join her brother who had advised her not to undertake such a journey as there were only Greek men here and it was no place for her. However, The Begona ship was full of women and girls on their way to rectify the imbalance and fostering the Greek Australian community becoming new brides to the men and later Australian Citizens.
Leaving the hardships of the village and journeying to a foreign land on her own wasn’t easy for her either. Her expectations were dashed upon her arrival at Princess Pier and looking out over the rusting corrugated iron roofs that looked ugly and rundown.
She persevered. She married, they bought a house and raised us. One thing that stood out about Mum is her ability to prepare incredible banquets for her husband’s giorti or any celebration. She would cook for days on end making sure everything was in place then clean up and prepare herself and us for the next day. Mum always had others in mind too. She was generous and kind visiting and taking plates of food and cakes or freshly grown things when she visited people. She was loved and admired by others gregarious and friendly to all.
When I remember our Mum now Mother’s Day has a different meaning. She isn’t here for us to please with our gifts and compliments so our gratitude can’t be conveyed other than in solemn thoughts and in memories of her. Mum, as far as you came for some hope of your own and some liberty you are now never far away.
