The way we raise our children will have a lasting impact on whether or not the Greek culture, language and traditions will prosper in Australia… or will it?

There is a common perception in the Greek community that if you encourage, and in some cases force, your children to learn the Greek language, participate in cultural activities such as dancing, theatre, and practice the Greek Orthodox religion then they will ensure that the Greek culture lives on for many generations in Australia.

There is also a fear that if we don’t, the language and culture of Hellenism in Australia will be lost forever. However, Dr Helen Kalaboukas, psychologist and Principal of ARISTON says a child has so much to gain by being bicultural.

Research that she has conducted shows the benefits of a child learning another language and culture include: problem solving skills; increased creativity; and improved overall school performance. “It’s very, very, important to not just develop their own identity, but we want to encourage people from a Greek background to develop their bicultural identity as well,” says Dr Kalaboukas.

Mother of two Christina Heristanidis says she has opted to encourage her children in areas that they are good at, and their Hellenism has grown from this style of parenting. She says her daughter Sophia’s ‘Greekness’ comes out in a more academic way whereas her son Lukas’ ‘Greekness’ reveals itself in a more cultural way. Her daughter Sophia has embraced the language and cultural activities of being Greek.

She attends Greek school, and dances as part of it and loves to be around her grandparents where she soaks up more about her heritage. Her son Lukas, who loves being in the garden with his grandparents, loves the iconography and aesthetic side of the culture. He’s also incredibly filoxenos, which she says is innate in his Greek nature as she wonders if his ability to play soccer better than AFL stems from a Greek background.

“As long as he can communicate [in Greek] with my parents I am happy. I love the fact Sophia can read and write and speak so well but not everybody has that talent and we foster it,” she says. Dr Kalaboukas says that although we live in Australia, it’s very important “for the children to know their ‘Greekness’ and love being Greek”.

During a recent trip to Australia, Professor of Linguistics and former Greek Education Minister – and father of the Greek dictionary – Professor George Babiniotis noted that children of Greek backgrounds have a lot to learn from their ‘twofold identity’ adding that such “an identity is a privilege – it affords two perspectives for the world, of life, of people”.

Father of two, Vasili Papanicolou, taught his children first how to be a model human, as he believes it is intrinsic to Hellenism. That way, by default, his children would learn and understand not what it means to be Greek, but what it means to be a Hellene. “My dad used to articulate the difference between being Greek and Hellenic and his view is that there are some things that are deeper than souvlaki and zorba that is about being Greek ,” explains Mr Papanicolou.

“It’s that notion, that philosophical inquiry, knowing about the world and wanting to question things all the time; that passionate response to the aesthetic, the filoxenia and filotimo. “Those people who are driving that regimented approach to raising children, what they are actually doing is being a non-Hellene in my mind as one of the fundamental factors of being Hellene is to question, have your own opinion to sit and reflect – not ‘this is what I have to do as it’s being drummed into me’.”

Other parents have the view that the only way is Greek in a sense, and feel that by leading an insular and Greek-only lifestyle, they will ensure that their children are ‘true Greeks’ and are not influenced by any other culture. Maria Mougios, parent and Greek school teacher believes that although she was strict with her children, it was her way of showing her love.

When she had children, she said she raised them exactly the same way as her parents raised her in Greece, and says that she made the conscious decision not to better her English in an attempt to teach her children to speak perfect Greek. She also thwarted her children from mixing with other cultures. “All of my kids speak Greek exactly like those in Greece – they speak it even better sometimes, because some Greeks are mixing the language with foreign English words,”

Mrs Mougios tells Neos Kosmos who adds that she is saddened by some children of Greek background having chosen English as their first language over Greek. But Ms Heristanidis says being Greek is more than speaking the language. “Being able to speak [Greek] is fantastic but I think culture is so much more complicated than just the language,” she says.

Mr Papanicolou agrees: “Yes language, culture and traditions are important but it’s really about a headspace and how you identify with something that makes you Greek rather than whether you can dance a Greek dance or not,” he says, “it’s that understanding of that longevity and the roots of where you come from.” During his visit, Professor Babiniotis spoke passionately about the importance of learning Greek for the Greek Australians and told the Greek community at a seminar that “learning Greek has to start very early from kindergarten and continue all through the school grades” and that “parents, teachers, friends, community should highlight the importance to learn [Greek]”.

Ms Heristanidis believes it’s better to guide your children in understanding who they are and where they came from and it’s up to them to be receptive or not. She says a big part of understanding their identity stems from their relationship with their grandparents. When she was growing up, her mother was a Greek teacher and instilled in her children the importance of education and family.

This is now by default being passed down to her children too. Her children are exposed to Greek music, Greek television and the Greek garden when they are at yiayia and pappou’s house. Mr Papanicolou echoes this point saying that the grandparents – who cared for his children whilst he and his wife were at work – became the “benchmark for [his] children learning the Greek language”.

He says most of his children’s ability to speak Greek comes from the contact with their grandparents, and whilst as parents he and his wife chose not to speak Greek to his children to ensure they had an exceptional grasp of the English language, they did deliberately ensure their children could communicate in Greek. “Grandparents are very important as they are the first generation and they have firsthand experience of the culture and language so their role is important to teach the kids,” says Dr Kalaboukas.

“Grandparents don’t have the pressure that parents have so they are more relaxed and can teach a lot more to the kids and the children can pick up the positive feelings and they learn to love the culture better.”

She says the grandparents have more time to teach the children about culture and allow them to take part in making koulouria and dying eggs at Easter, and taking them to church services and explaining the practices of the Greek Orthodox religion. A common fear in our community has developed due to the ageing Greek population.

The concern is that with the first generation passing on, so too will the firsthand knowledge of the Greek culture and language. “There is a lot of pessimism in our community that we are going to lose our culture and I don’t think so,” says Dr Kalaboukas adding she chooses to be an optimist on this matter. “I believe we aren’t going to lose our culture and language.

Maybe our children aren’t going to speak the language as well as Greek children in Greece because it’s a difficult language so we need to be realistic about how much they can learn, but what I am very positive about is I am sure our kids love being Greek, they love the culture – it’s a beautiful culture – and we can teach it in many forms like theatre films, music and dancing to makes it interesting for the kids.” Professor Babiniotis was also optimistic of the future of the Greek language in Australia adding that more high quality bilingual schools need to be established.

Mr Papanicolou believes the Greek culture will survive as it’s intrinsic to our identity and he believes that future generations will be “more discerning” with what they choose to teach their children as they won’t have the influence of their parents who are first-generation Greek Australians. However, Mrs Mougios is not convinced. “I’m scared because when we came to Australia, we would speak Greek everywhere, at functions and events, now the events are diminishing,” she says. “The first migrants are dying and the events are under populated. The second generation isn’t showing an interest and we have to get them involved for the third generation so it never stops. We have to make more of an effort.”

But with a vibrant diaspora community in Australia, a focus towards film, song, food and dance and events celebrating the culture and language, Greeks in Australia are doing their utmost to hold on to traditions and celebrate all there is to be Greek, and do it in their own way. As Mr Papanicolou always tells his children: “Don’t let anyone tell you that you are not Greek because you don’t phrase something properly or you only know one of three dances, because you are Greek. “Being Greek is something deeper.”